So, you’re thinking about jumping into the sexuality wellness field? First of all, welcome! We need more diverse, compassionate, and open-minded folks in this space. But I get it—starting out can feel like walking into the deep end, especially in a world where talking about sex still makes people squirm. The good news? It’s an exciting ride, and with a little guidance, you’ll find your groove. Here are a few things I wish someone had told me when I was getting started.
Educate Yourself (Yeah, seriously)
I know, it sounds super basic. But before you dive into this work, you gotta know the landscape. The sexuality wellness field has exploded in the last decade. Ten years ago, being a sex educator pretty much meant you were either a therapist, a public health expert, or a teacher giving the ol' birds-and-the-bees talk to kids. Fast forward to today, and there are a million ways to do this work—advocacy, content creation, workshops, coaching, and more.
The first step is figuring out where you fit in. Once you know your vibe, it’s time to nerd out. Take courses, go to workshops, and devour books on topics like sex ed, anatomy, communication, and consent.
Seriously, read all the things. Having a solid foundation makes you feel legit in your role, so keep soaking up knowledge. And remember: it’s not just about facts—it’s about people, connection, and empathy.
Forget “networking”—focus on building community
This field is all about who you know, but let’s be real: "networking" sounds so transactional. You’re not just collecting business cards—you’re building a community of people who support and inspire you. Early on, I started by reaching out to folks whose work I admired. That turned into friendships, collaborations, and some killer opportunities. You don’t have to do this work solo.
So, whether it’s through online groups, conferences, or even sliding into someone's DMs (professionally, of course), find your people. There are so many seasoned pros out there who are willing to help, and connecting with them will open up doors you didn’t even know existed. The field is full of folks ready to support you, so don’t be shy about reaching out!
Perfection? Nah, just start
You’re never going to feel totally ready—and that’s okay. The important thing is to start, even if it’s small. You don’t need all the answers right now, and you certainly don’t need a perfect plan. Whether you’re creating content, starting a blog, or volunteering at an organization, getting your feet wet is how you figure out what works for you. The sexuality wellness field is massive, and there’s plenty of room for you to find your niche as you go. Authenticity is what resonates with people, so lean into what feels real for you. When you align your purpose with your work, the
opportunities will come. Promise.
The road can be bumpy, but it’s worth it
Let’s be real: this field can be challenging. But if you stay dedicated, find your community, and stay true to yourself, you’ll make a real impact. Your voice is needed here—so don’t hold back. Dive in, be open to evolving, and enjoy the ride.
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About the Author:
Dirty Lola is an award-winning sex edutainer, speaker, and self-proclaimed dildo slinger. Known for her live sex ed, Q&A show, Sex Ed A Go-Go, and as a Sexpert on
the Emmy Nominated Netflix docuseries The Principles of Pleasure, Lola has spent over a decade working to end the stigma and shame surrounding sex and sexuality while sharing her discoveries with polyamory and kink.
Lola is an instructor for Everyone Deserves Sex Ed and is on the board of the Youth Sexpert Program. She has brought her unique flavor of sex-ed to numerous sexual wellness brands and media outlets such as New York Magazine, HBO, and Vice.
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